Thursday, May 31, 2007
Listening to Katherine McPhee's Ordinary World.
a streak of tear flowed down when i think about you.
i asked myself if i hate you
i dunno the answer.
it's just painful. i dunno the rest.
anyway.
i hardly talk about my fyp
and now it's over.
lemme officially introduce my team
Zhi Qun aka zqzqzq - the badminton/rigging/animation guru
he's fun, responsible, lame, loving with his ylylyl. without him i dunno how this team will become!
Hui Fen aka big head - the sha da jie who isnt sha at all. all the textures and props placement all done my her ok! ok la just that she name file abit diao only. a folder call (i i remember correctly) "final textures(can be deleted)"
See Jay aka CJ/lengzhe/kan jie lun - the animator the compositor. handled one of the toughest animation and saved my ass for compositing. oh oh oh. and most of all, he modelled whole damn props! but behold his coldness! watch your words or u will frozen! HAHAHAHA
Kingston aka Too Thai Long/kingstone/jing si dun - the GAY! who did the 2d drawings for props and the one who created the legendary bible. though he works slow and often get shoots by me. in the end i guess he's a valuable member. just look at all the impressed faces of the lecturers while flipping thru the bible!
LAST BUT NOT LEAST
Kaiyun aka My Yun/my love - the power girl who did lighting and rendering. cmon all the outlines WERE FREAKING DONE BY HER. tremendous patience and responsibility. well must really really credit her for being very responsible as she even come down to do work when she's sick. when every stayed overnight and cmi le, she continued to work and work. SOMEONE tell ME. HOW CAN I DUN LOVE HER? LOL
well...
then it's me
Yee Long aka bnn - some animation some modelling some compositing. hahahaha
i can only say.
i never feel so much for a team i've work with b4
i love fyp
i love the ppl
so people, please enjoy ur fyp for it's something you can never get outside
hmm i'm getting emotional HAHA
=p
bnn strummed a note at Thursday, May 31, 2007
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
restarted my com
seems to be a breeze compared to last time.
but still took quite some time to.
you, yes you.
i really dunno if u even will look at this
but i pasted my below entry from my livejournal just for you.
can u freaking delete me from ur links?
it's hard to be like this but i can only say
you dun deserve to put my existence anywhere you like.
anyone i know seems more precious than you.
wadeva.
anyway today's 1st day of iap
interesting in some ways.
i finally get to learn how to use flash in the proper workflow
might be tedious and repeating in the long run but i guess
it'll be extremely good training for me
i'll be equipped with so many skills
2d 3d fundamentals
i miss the fy group =o
bnn strummed a note at Tuesday, May 29, 2007
i need way more time.
the time i needed ur absence, you appear in front of me time and again
time and again
you had to appear infront of me to show me how happy you are in front of others
i hate
i hate your laughter, i hate your giggle, i hate your smile
when they were right in front of me, as if they are mocking at me on YOUR purpose.
i feel so.
i think u were doing it on purpose.
stop that innocent facade and get things right.
by saying dunno wont help things.
your voice is piercing
your existence really stings
why did i even let myself go into such a situation in the 1st place
this 3 months will be a great break from you.
my birthday wish..
i hope that u will nvr. appear in my life again. EVER.
how i wish u will look at this entry and cry or at least feel sad
but i know YOU WONT EVEN feeling a TINGE of sadness
dun even mention.
just from your razor sharp happiness i can feel it
like pressing a pen knife trying to pierce it in my skin
slowly moving it around once u're in it.
you are cruel.
so cruel.
bnn strummed a note at Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Thursday, May 24, 2007
ur presence stings innocently
bnn strummed a note at Thursday, May 24, 2007
Monday, May 21, 2007
coldness or innocence.
i believe it's coldness.
wad do u think?
have you been reading my blog?
i guess not.
haha
why should i even think and care.
i dunno.
fyp ending and now i'm still in sch
2 11am
lol..
taiyou no uta photobook is up!
i can finally get it yay.
i dunno wad i should hope for my bday.
i dun really hope u will disappear in my life
but it seems to be the truth that i'll probably feel better with u disappearing in my life as a whole
u will probably feel better too. or do u actually feel anything at all?
bnn strummed a note at Monday, May 21, 2007
Thursday, May 17, 2007
more than nothing
less than a stranger
it's been flashing thru my mind
how 'good' we were as friends
yet your conclusion can be that u have nothing else to say to me
on the other hand, even kaiyun whom's just my team mate, someone whom i disturb everyday
can just talk to me, even if it's some irrelevant thing which just makes the friendship better lol
why?
and the fact that u've been around all the time doesnt make anything better.
i hope IAP will wash u off my mind.
bnn strummed a note at Thursday, May 17, 2007
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
were you at a lost?
when we meet in the walkway.
when your steps didn't know where to move
where you hesitated to wait for protection
i forced my eyes to ignore you.
yet my heart felt it undeniably.
piercing.
bnn strummed a note at Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Monday, May 14, 2007
are you really that cold?
or you have feelings untold?
what faith do you hold?
are you even there
can't find you anywhere
heart starts to tear
tearing apart to see if you even care.
it was all i could give
probably i was naive
but that was all i wanted to receive
yet all i can do is to deceive
nothing's left in my heart
as we start to part
i thought i will be okay
till i start to decay
i know you're never there
like you never ever care
bla.
i'm ok
just wanna type some random words that rhyme.
i shall do that for chinese words so i can write songs
bnn strummed a note at Monday, May 14, 2007
Sunday, May 13, 2007
it is not exactly very very sad
but it is lonely
the tune
the way it's been sung
love the electric guitar playing at the back.
the only drawback; is that it made me miss you more.
小茉莉 请记得我 不要把我忘记
bnn strummed a note at Sunday, May 13, 2007
dedicate for you.
《小茉莉(杨丞琳)》
清晨下了一场雨 露水沾湿了小茉莉
白色花瓣纯洁又清晰地闻著你的呼吸
晚风吹拂青草地 夕阳染红了小茉莉
微笑绽放不言也不语看不透你的秘密
月光静静 薄暮笼罩小茉莉
凝视著你 舍不得离开你
月光静静 薄暮垄罩小茉莉
等候著你 走进我的梦里
小茉莉 是否你会把我忘记
小茉莉 请记得我 还在这里
小茉莉 在枝头上自然美丽
小茉莉 请记得我 不要把我忘记
dunno
when i listen to this
i feel very.
i cant describe.
...
if giving up something is ever so easy.
haha
bnn strummed a note at Sunday, May 13, 2007
i miss u.
yet it's painful to feel ur presence
bnn strummed a note at Sunday, May 13, 2007
i miss u.
yet it's painful to feel ur presence
bnn strummed a note at Sunday, May 13, 2007
Thursday, May 10, 2007
lol it's good to see that more ppl are actually knowing YUI!
like some ppl in my msn contacts i see their nick hahahaha
good.
psychoed more ppl to know YUI as well LOL
she rocks!
anyway the real reason why i'm bloggin now is
i dunno why i suddenly have this thought of relief that i'm still like this.
i dun actually know wad i mean by that too
but.
being single isnt a bad thing, esp when u dun really have a choice.
at least ur money is ur money
ur trouble is ur trouble
your worries are ur worries
it's nice to be alone at times.
i can say vulgar as i like LOL
i can do my own work at my own time
no big deal lol.
i hope i'm not deceiving myself but right now i dun feel i am
bnn strummed a note at Thursday, May 10, 2007
Tuesday, May 08, 2007
reply to ritz; guitar slowly progressing. but i think i am slowly improving in terms of chords. but in the span of learning, i really realised my left fingers are more spastic than right ones. -.- still have to train my pinky biggggggggg time =o
.......
...
nvm.
nothing else i say matters.
bnn strummed a note at Tuesday, May 08, 2007
still pretty constipated.
i dun feel depressed or all hopes are lost.
in fact it shouldnt be this way.
i just need a break from everything.
bnn strummed a note at Tuesday, May 08, 2007
Monday, May 07, 2007
even with it removed.
i still visit that today.
it's a habit already.
..
bnn strummed a note at Monday, May 07, 2007
now my feeling is like my fingers.
slowly getting seasoned as the fingertips' die off to harden as a protection to play guitar better.
now it's still painful but it's slowly getting seasoned.
for the guitar part, i am happy about it.
regarding you.
i dunno.
i got the feeling one day i could possibly go crazy and run right in front of you, in front of everyone. and say things i have never been able to say in real life.
be it courage or opportunity where i both lack at appropriate times.
but i guess there wasnt anytime where it was appropriate.
haha.
i dunno what i'm thinking.
bnn strummed a note at Monday, May 07, 2007
Sunday, May 06, 2007
i wonder if i should throw away those letters.
what seemed so precious to me
cant really bear to.
anyway.
if u're reading this blog.
just do me this last favor, in fact u've been owing me.
complete the collab.
thanks
bnn strummed a note at Sunday, May 06, 2007
good bye girl
good bye girl
good bye my feelings for you
good bye girl
good bye girl
it's no turning back for real
good bye girl
good bye girl
now i wonder how you feel
memories searched past me every inch
now the pain is starting to grip me through
through this lonely night
good bye girl
good bye girl
what will come without you
good bye girl
good bye girl
now it's time for me to part
good bye girl
good bye girl
good bye to the girl in my heart.
bnn strummed a note at Sunday, May 06, 2007
Saturday, May 05, 2007
it's gonna be a painful night.
i'm not exactly quite alright
waiting for the sunlight
i'll try to sleep tight
bla i'll go compose some chinese songs.
bnn strummed a note at Saturday, May 05, 2007
be gone with bad past
i have good friend, i have food family. i have good skills and future!
that's my 1st neoprints
hahaha so fun with stan and drea
makes me feel like a complete person again
got a 4 gb thumby for 55 bucks and fixed my hdd!
haha...
life isnt bad.
=]
bnn strummed a note at Saturday, May 05, 2007
you're simple minded.
and that kills.
i hate the way you sound so happy and cheery
when things aint going that way.
i hate it when u say you're not exactly forced
just that you tried to find excuse to talk even when u have nothing else to say to me
i hate it when everything you see it's just so surface level
i hate it when i realise that my life will be better with u out of my sight
in my life i've nvr gone to this extent to chase someone out of my life
but you took it simple.
kindness is not needed here.
simplemindedness dun work here
i'm not an angel or a saint
friends, i doubt that'll nvr come again for your simplemindedness
and a simple 'i dunno why i treat you like this'
you are not worth.
dun bother appreciating any thing
they aint true in the 1st place.
be thankful of that fact that i'm chasing you out of my life.
a pest gone
i dun need such meaningless friendship.
i'm learning as it goes.
well for that.
i dun blame you.
i only hate the way you see things.
i blame my foolishness
so why not hate me too.
thing'll be better that way.
remove me from ur blog.
i dun need that fake status anyway.
bnn strummed a note at Saturday, May 05, 2007
Friday, May 04, 2007
i dunno
i guess i shouldnt talk at all
i think today or even lately i keep pissing ppl off or letting ppl dun dare to get close to me
but yes
you.
do me a favor.
i feel ok and well and normal without ur presence
i feel good without u talking to me
i get uneasy when you are in my sight
i feel pissed when you talk to me
so my favor is, get away from me
i'm not ordering you around or wad.
well it's inevitable that we will see each other around
so why not just treat me as transparent and i think doing that is easier for both you and ME. if you dun think it's easy then just then treat me as transparent as a favor from me
i hate it when you're just showing ur kindness like it's obliged to
talk to other strangers or whoever i wont even care or wad
just dun talk to me and just treat me as transparent
i think i should be grateful to you
well a part of me seems lost but i think i live more normal than ever without that.
i know you're a simple minded person
those are just my thoughts
so now, leave me alone from now on =]
hai..
YUI shall heal my soul.
bnn strummed a note at Friday, May 04, 2007
Thursday, May 03, 2007
i love YUI
and life goes on without dreaming.
without you
not like it's of any real significance in the 1st place, i guess.
i shall get all of YUI's hi res MTVs
I LOVE YUI
bnn strummed a note at Thursday, May 03, 2007
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
nothing pessimistic really.
but i guess u're fine as u are now.
i'm always the one who thinks too much.
life seems totally ok for me, just that tinge of unwillingless to let go
that you can never feel.
well having said so much i do wonder if u know who u are.
i guess
you happy can le ba.
even though i really hate to say that haha
and i cant provide that even as a friend no matter how i try.
..
bnn strummed a note at Tuesday, May 01, 2007